golden slumbers

You know those times in life that can make you smile and cry at the same time? It's like when you finish a really good book. It was depressing to the point of tears, yet strangely beautiful. You close the cover and sigh. Your heart is empty, but full. You don't feel sad because it was perfect, and it has become a part of you.

"I love you. Good-by--because I love you." -The Awakening

"I can't stay." "I know." -The Time Traveler's Wife

"Are you carrying the fire?" -The Road

"It just wasn't me that you were right about." -(500) Days of Summer

"It's me, the one who survived to tell the story." -In the Time of the Butterflies

"I'll see you soon then?" -Dear John

all together now

Katsaridaphobia. The cockroach police came by Mckensie's room yesterday and told her that more cockroaches were found in our bathroom. Cockroaches travel in packs. Where there's one, there are hundreds. Our hallway is infested with cockroaches.

Speaking of cockroaches, I'm writing my research paper for English 251 on Kafka's The Metamorphosis. It's a novella about a young man named Gregor who wakes up one day to find that he has metamorphosed into a cockroach. For my paper, I'm specifically focusing on Gregor's sister, Grete, and analyzing her from a feminist perspective. I really enjoy feminist theory and The Metamorphosis is such a masterpiece, I'm actually having fun with this research paper! Never thought I'd see the day.

"I have been reading The Metamorphosis at home, and I find it bad." --Franz Kafka...Just goes to show that authors don't know everything about their works.

a day in the life

Devin: (Calmly) Hey Marissa, look, there's a cockroach crawling up your nightgown.

Marissa: (Equally as calm) Why Devin, it seems as though you are right. Let's calmly get it out of here without killing it because we don't kill other living creatures.

Devin walks, nonchalantly, over to the cockroach and traps it in a cup, handily found nearby.

Devin: (Happily) There you go, little buddy! She lowers the cockroach to the ground, setting

him free in the courtyard.

Marissa: Thank you, Devin, for handling that cockroach with such kind care. Goodnight!

Devin: Goodnight, Marissa!

End scene.

AS IF.

This morning (1:30am) came with much shrieking and freaking out and jumping on beds when the hugest cockroach I've ever seen was found crawling up my nightgown. Many fruitless minutes were spent with Devin trying to trap the cockroach in a library bag while it was flying around in my desk and I was looking on from a safe distance (standing on Devin's bed). Devin really did try hard, and I have to commend her courage, but unfortunately, she did not succeed in trapping the cockroach. It disappeared to underneath my bed. Obviously, I could not spend the entire night on my bed, with a cockroach lurking right underneath me, so I went next door and snuggled up with Mckensie in her bed. Devin came in ten minutes after me, blanket and pillow in hand. "Can I just come sleep on the floor?" Devin asked. "No, just go get in Maggie's bed!" answered Kenzi. "She might freak out a little at first, but she'll understand." So, Devin crawled up into bed with Maggie and we had a really great impromptu slumber party. Cockroaches are such wily little critters.

glad all over

glad is what this familiar song makes me. every time.

a taste of honey

This is today at Temple Beach.

It's been such a lovely day.

Days like today help me appreciate Hawaii.

I'm not excited for everyone to leave me here,

but I am slightly looking forward to summer and nicer weather,

even if I have to enjoy it on my own.

Aloha.

cry for a shadow

Dear Utah,

I miss you. Especially these parts:

The Orsaks are probably my favorite family in the world. Rachelle and Trey are so cool and also married. Conner is the sweetest little nephew and he's growing up so fast! Lauren just may be the coolest person I've ever met. She is also the best dancer I've ever met. My parents are not old and they are so cute. My mom drops the best rhymes around and I'm pretty sure my dad is a CIA agent. High school and cheer were great. I miss Kelsey and Carley. They're the greatest friends I could ever ask for! I miss summer and my cabin. Mitzi and I share such a deep connection. Sometimes I talk to her on the phone and she purrs.

I can't wait to see you all in just 18 days!

when i'm sixty-four

Marissa, what is the instrument called that has like a baby piano on the side of it and the middle of it pulls in and out? You hold it, old men play it. You know what I mean?

little texts like that make me smile.

don't ever change

today in the caf, there was some kareoke going on to promote a pair of candidates for our student body elections going on today and tomorrow. two girls got up and sang a song from mckensie's top five faves. she danced like a lune.

do you want to know a secret

i am a very obsessive/passionate person. in my mind, everything is THE BEST or my ABSOLUTE FAVORITE thing in the whole world. furthermore, i am very passionate about my obsessions, whether they be fleeting or lingering. at the moment, i am quite obsessed with 1984, writing letters, sewing, going to 100% of my classes, and speaking espanol. when i was young, my obsessions probably changed daily.

lucy in the sky with diamonds

"This paper is a gem," wrote Ned. "Your thesis is valid and corrective. Your presentation of evidence is orderly without seeming overly regimented; rather, your argument and evidence unfold in a clear line of reasoning and analysis. While other papers contain a number of detailed corrections and suggestions, yours, virtually error free, is a solid critical performance."

My day brightened significantly after receiving my paper back from Ned (part athlete, part professor).

another girl

Everyone I know that has a blog is either super cool or married. I guess this makes me super cool.